It's Not Her (Tsukishima x Reader)

    “You want to have one more practice match against them?” the coach asked.

    “Yes,” the captain said.  “Is it too much to ask for?”

    The coach heaved a sigh.  “As long as you don’t sprain your ankle again before the game, then I have no problems.  However—I’m setting up more conditions for you.”

    Oikawa stiffens.  “I-I understand.”

    “Iwaizumi-senpai,” a girl asks.  “What practice match are they talking about?”

    A guy with brown short hair turns to her.  “Oh yeah, you weren’t here then.  It’s a practice match against Karasuno High School. We lost against them in the last practice match.”

    “They’re that amazing?”

    “You could say so.”

    “So that’s why we’re playing against them again?”

    “There’s that too but I’m sure there are other underlying reasons,” Iwaizumi said.  “Anyway, let’s go back to cleaning up or else the coach would get angry.”

    “He’d only get angry if we play around though,” the girl said. 

    Iwaizumi laughed.  “I see you’re getting the hang of it, being the manager.”

    “She’s been really supportive as well,” Watari added.

    “Keep up the good work,” Matsukawa said.  “Even after we graduate, I hope you continue to support these guys as well.”  He pointed to the second and first years.

    “But of course,” the girl manager says with a smile.

    “Alright,” the coach announces.  “Let’s clean up quickly.”

    “Osu!”

    “Karasuno High School,” the girl slowly mutters under her breath. 

     

    *-------------------------*-------------------------*

 

    “Woah! That’s amazing,” she cheered.  “Even though you’re still short.”

    He pouted.  “Shut up.  You’re shorter than me.”

    She still smiled.  “Who cares who’s shorter?  You were still able to receive that and you're happy about it.”

    “I'm not.  And I was only able to receive it because nii-chan’s going easy on me,” he remarked.

    "Actions speak louder than words, Kei-kun.  You're eyes are lighting up and you're only trying to suppress a smile."

    "Shut up, shorty."

    "You're short just the same."

    "I'm already taller than the rest in our grade."

    An older guy walked up to the boy and girl and patted their heads.  “Okay, okay, that's enough.  You’re both still growing, but who knows, maybe Kei would become taller than me. As far as I know, he’s already growing quickly.”

    “Eeeeh?  That’s unfair,” she complains.  “I want to grow taller too but considering that my parents are only of average height, I wonder if I’ll ever grow to be taller than them.”

    “Keep pouting and you’ll never grow,” Kei said.

    Despite just having been told, the girl pouted.  “If you keep wording your sentences in a negative way, people would misunderstand you, you know.  You could have said, ‘(y/n), if you keep smiling, I’m sure that you’d grow taller and more beautiful'.”

    “I didn’t say anything about being beautiful.”

    “Huh? Oh, uh, sorry, that just slipped out,” (y/n) said, faking a smile.

    Tsukishima Kei stared at this neighbor of his, already sensing that something had happened earlier that day.  “You’re ugly,” he said.

    “Hey, Kei, you’re not supposed to say that to a girl,” the older of the Tsukishima brothers scolded.

    “If anybody tells you that, then they’re pathetic,” Kei continued.  “But if you actually believe them, you'd be more pathetic.  Then again, you’re like the ugly duckling.”

    “Come on Kei,” the brother said.  “Be direct and say that she’s cute.”

    “Don't want to.”

    “You’re really not cute at all.”

    (Y/n) giggles.  “I think he is,” she says with a blush.  "Thank you, Kei-kun.  I won’t forget you ever told me that."

    The boy turned his head away.  "Whatever."

     

    *-------------------------*-------------------------*

     

    "You're having a match against Aoba Johsai?" Tsukishima Akiteru asked.

    "Yeah," the blonde-haired tall guy said.

    "Well, do your best and win it."

    "We barely won the last practice match and that was because their captain wasn't around.  I don't think it would happen again the second time."

    "You're such a negative thinker."

    "But it's true."

    "Do you think I could come watch?"

    "Don't you dare," Kei said.

    Akiteru sighed.  "If (y/n) could see you now, she'd tell you to change your way of thinking.  Maybe she'd even say, 'oh come on, Kei-kun, why don't you just let him?' And then you'd let me."

    The younger brother scoffed.  "As if she'd be able to make that big an influence.  As far as I know, she stopped existing."

    Akiteru replied with silence as his brother's words left his mouth.  The conversation stopped there.

     

    *-------------------------*-------------------------*

     

    (A day back in grade school . . . )

    "Tsukishima!  Tsukishima! Tsukishima!"

    The boy grunted.  "What?"

    "Oh, nothing," the girl said.

    "Then don't be so annoying."

    "But I'm not being annoying.  Am I, Yamaguchi-kun?"

    "N-Not really," the freckled face boy says.

    "See?  Anyway, how's volleyball practice?" (Y/n) asked.

    "It's been pretty much the same everyday," Yamaguchi answered.

    "I hear you guys haven't been active much."

    "It's just a club," Tsukishima answered.

    "Is that so?  But I enjoy watching volleyball, whether it's just a club or not."

    ". . ."

    (Y/n) smiled.  "Actions speaks louder than words.  Even though you still say it's just a club, you're still doing your part, albeit in the shadows, Kei-kun.  You still suck at ‘connecting’ with your team mates though."

    "Tch.  You're really annoying."

    The girl pouted.  "Stop saying that I'm annoying all the time.  You're twice as annoying as I am."

     

    *-------------------------*-------------------------*

     

    "Greetings!"

    "Nice to meet you!"

    "Nice to meet you!"

    The members from the Karasuno volleyball club warmed up and got ready while those from Aoba Johsai prepared a court for the game. 

     

    "Oi, Hinata, don't be intimidated now," Kageyama warned.  "We can't have you acting scared like last time."

    "I-I'm not scared," an orange-headed boy said.  "But we're against the Grand King after all."

    "Ryu~, they have a manager," a short boy with spiked up hair and brown highlights said, acting like in despair.

    "When did they get one?  And a beauty at that," a taller guy with a bald head complained.

    "Nishinoya, Tanaka, calm down," Sawamura said. 

    "They're over reacting over a single girl," Tsukishima commented.

    "Hey, Tsukki," Yamaguchi said.  "That girl's looking over here."

    Tsukishima turned his head to the direction of the girl and their eyes met.  She, staring at him, and him, staring back.  He lifted an eyebrow in question and then the girl turned away, going back to do her manager duties.  After a while, she looked back at the opponent’s team.

    "Wow," she said.  "Their female manager is a real beauty.  I'm jealous."

    "What are you saying, you're beautiful yourself," Kindaichi said. 

    "When did you learn to say such things, Kindaichi-kun?"

    "Eh? Ah, n-no, it's not my w-words," he stuttered.  "Our classmates have been saying it for a long time now."

    The girl smiled.  "Really?  I'm flattered but," the smile faded.  "This isn't my natural beauty, remember?"

    Kindaichi immediately apologized. "S-sorry.  I had forgotten.  I'm really sorry."

    "It's alright," she said.  "Anyways, good luck out there on the court.  Do your best."

    "Y-yes.  Thank you very much!"

    "Geez, Kindaichi, no need to be so stiff.  We're going to be together for the next three years, loosen up a bit."

    "Uh—okay."

    "The same goes for you, Kunimi," the girl said, looking at the laid-back looking guy. 

    "Sure, sure," he answered.

     

    The whistle blew and the players took their position.

    “Wow, that guy with the glasses is really tall,” Seijo’s female manager said.  “As I thought he’s a middle blocker but he doesn’t really have motivation does he?”

    As the first set rolled on, more and more comments came from the girl and they were all about Tsukishima and how bad he was doing.  The boy glared at her but she didn’t feel intimidated.  She simply returned his stare.  He clicked his tongue and turned the other way.

    “This is the first time I see Tsukishima this irritated,” Sugawara commented.  “It’s not like the girl’s saying anything that offensive.”

    “I don’t think it’s that,” Yamaguchi said, staring at the female manager of their opponent’s team.  “I think it’s because her behavior reminds him of someone.”

    “Wow, I’d like to meet this person you’re talking about.”

    Yamaguchi looks at the floor, his hands slowly clench beside him.  “That would be impossible,” he said. 

    The first set ends.  The score’s 23-25, in favor of Aoba Johsai.

    “Tsukki, are you alright?”  Yamaguchi asks. 

    Tsukishima was breathing heavily with head bent.  “Shut up and let me clear my head.”

     

    *-------------------------*-------------------------*

     

    (1^st year in Junior High . . . )

    “(Y/n) didn’t come to school today,” Yamaguchi mentioned and looked at his friend.  No reply.  He knew that Tsukishima was worried.  It was unusual, after all, for (y/n) not to come to school without notifying anyone about her absence.

    The two boys were already close to the Tsukishima household when they noticed the commotion going around where (y/n) lives so they stopped in their tracks.  Neighbors had gathered together outside the (L/n) house.  Before the boys were able to get closer though, they were stopped. 

    “Kei,” Akiteru said.  “Get into the house.”

    “Nii-chan, did something happen?” Kei asked.

    "Get into the house," the older brother repeated, more sternly this time.

    “They died in an accident?” one of the neighbors asked.

    The two middle schoolers turned their heads at those words.

    “The car brakes stopped working and they unfortunately collided with a truck.  I heard that it was terrible the way the accident turned out.”

    “They say that you wouldn’t even be able to make out their faces anymore.”

    “Wait, so the accident that appeared on the news, it was really the (L/n)s?”

    Kei glanced at his brother, hoping that it wasn’t true but Akiteru had looked away with the undeniable expression, that it was the truth, clear on his face.  He felt his chest tighten. 

     

    *-------------------------*-------------------------*

     

    The whistle was blown, signaling the beginning of the second set.

    Aoba Johsai had changed their rotation while Karasuno kept theirs.  The change alarmed the Karasuno players.  Oikawa was in the front middle.  If it was his turn to serve, then Nishinoya, Tanaka and Kageyama would be the ones at the back to receive it.  But they found it a relief that at least Tsukishima, who's still lacking in receives, would be in front.

    Karasuno tried to gain as much points as possible before it was Oikawa's turn.  However, it still didn't take long before the rotation sent him to be the next server.

    Oikawa took position at the left side of their court.  Breathing out, he smirked, tossed the ball high into the air and hit the ball. 

    The path of the ball alarmed the receiving team.

    “Tsukishima!” the Karasuno team captain shouted.

    “It’s out,” the libero shouted as well.

    The middle blocker stepped out of the way of the ball’s path.  As the ball hit the floor, the line judge lowered the flag.

    “That was in?” the Karasuno volleyball players mentally shouted. 

    "It landed on the white line," Sugawara whispered.  "As usual, his serves are terrifying."

    "No wonder he served from the left side," Coach Ukai observed.  "That way he won't be able to get the angle wrong even with all that power."

    Oikawa dribbles the ball, spins it in his hand, tosses it in the air, and completes another serve.

    The ball hits Tsukishima's arms but it goes out of control.

    "Tch," Sawamura thought.  "It was to Tsukishima again. At this rate, Oikawa's going to aim for him again in the next serve."

    "Ah~ah," the female manager of Seijo said, loud enough for the others to hear.  "It was obvious by the first serve that Oikawa-senpai was aiming at him."

    "Tsukishima, don't mind, don't mind," Sawamura said.  "Stay closer to the lines."

    Oikawa smirks.  He repeats the serve, this time landing slightly short in front of Tsukishima.  The latter was barely able to receive it.  The ball goes up and over the net.  Before Karasuno was able to collect themselves, Seijo attacked and scored with a spike.

    The girl manager speaks up again.  "It's like he's limiting his movements," she said.  "That guy's height is wasted.  If only he was shorter~."

    "Hey," Yamaguchi shouted at the girl, which surprised the others.  "You've been saying a lot of rude things non-stop since the first set.  Why don't you shut up already?"

    "You really have been saying a lot of things about their middle blocker," Seijo's coach said.  "It's like your intentionally insulting him."

    "Sorry," the manager said.  "I'll keep quiet about their team from now on."

    Her words, however, continued to play in Tsukishima's head even though he tried not to let it get to him.  He took one glance at the girl and focused on the game.

    On the other hand, the girl turned to Yamaguchi's direction.  Their eyes met and Yamaguchi froze.  Her mouth turned upward into a smirk and she mouthed words to him.  "You'll see why, Yamaguchi."

    Oikawa's smirk still hasn't disappeared, but when he served to Tsukishima, that expression was wiped off his face. 

    The tall blonde had stayed calm.

    It's like he's limiting his movements.

    He shifted his position.

    If only he was shorter~.

    He lowered himself more than usual. 

    The ball came his way and he received it completely.  His team mates on the bench shouted in joy.

    The girl's lips curled into a smile.

    Hyped up with the effort their team mate put into receiving the serve, the Karasuno team gained the point and ended Oikawa's service streak.

    "Tsukishima, nice!" His team mates shouted, some slapped his back in the process.

    "Gaaah, I won't lose," grumbled Hinata.

     

    Slowly, Karasuno gained up on points and eventually took back the set.

     

    When the third set started, the points went back and forth.  Neither team able to get a break.  At this point, both teams were tired.

    "Hey, Kunimi!" the second coach of Seijo shouted.  "You had that coming for you."

    "Kunimi!" the manager also shouted.  "Get to work already."

    The mentioned player sighed.  "I get it.  I get it.  No need to shout."

    He jumps but the spike gets through him.

    "No you don't!" The coach and manager shout in unison.

    Seijo calls for a time-out and the female manager does her job, distributing the drinks and towels.

    "Your words are really shallow, you know?" The manager said to Kunimi.

    "Shut up already.  I already said I get it."

    "Then act on it already."

    The time-out ends and the game resumes.

     

    As he had promised, Kunimi put effort into his plays, eventually gaining points for the team.  Their manager starts to cheer for them. 

    "It's really starting to creep me out," Yamaguchi thought.  "I've never seen this girl before yet her very cheers are similar to (y/n)'s whenever she cheered at our volleyball games.  She even knows my name." He looked at Tsukishima.  "I wonder what he's thinking."

    The game ends, ending in Seijo's win in the deuce. 

     

    "You guys are really amazing," their manager complimented, continuing to hand out towels and drinks.

    "Thanks," Kindaichi said.

    "No problem."

    "But you've been giving hints to that middle blocker of theirs," Oikawa said.  "Like that time when you said, 'It's like he's limiting his movements.  That guy's height is wasted.  If only he was shorter~.'"

    The manager looks at the senpai and just smiles.  "I'll let you think whatever you want to think, senpai."

     

    "Oi," a voice speaks behind her. 

    The girl and the other members turn around. 

    "Hmmmm," Oikawa hummed.  "Did you need something, glasses guy?"

    "Hey, hey, Tsukishima," Sugawara half-whispered.  "What are you doing?  Get back here."

    Tsukishima ignored the vice-captain and looked at Seijo's manager.  "You—," he starts.  "Who are you?"

    "I'm Aoba Johsai's, aka Seijo's, volleyball club manager," the girl answered.

    "I already know that," Tsukishima said, trying to keep himself from losing control.  "I'm asking about who you are."

    ". . ."

    "In this match, were you really just trying to irritate me so that I'd lose my cool?  Or were you trying to imitate someone?"

    A pause. 

    "The ugly duckling," she said. 

    Tsukishima's eyes narrowed.  "Huh?"

    "She always said that she liked that story."

    ". . ."

    She takes a deep breath.  "I'm a close friend of (y/n), next to you and that guy Yamaguchi though," she answered slowly.  "She told me a lot about you so when I saw you today, I thought I'd try to imitate her and see how you'd react."

    "That's it?"

    "That's it."

    Tsukishima continued to look at her for a few more seconds before turning away.  "I see," he said.  There was the sound of defeat in his voice.  As if he had just realized that what he was hoping for was nothing else but false.  He gritted his teeth and walked away.

    Yamaguchi had been watching.  As Tsukishima walked away from the girl, he couldn't help but wonder what emotion the girl was holding in as she also watched Tsukishima walk away.  The expression in her eyes looked similar to—yearning.

     

    The Karasuno team left.

    "Tsukki," Yamaguchi started.  "Don’t let her ge—."

    Tsukishima cut in.  "When I saw her for the first time, she was nothing else but Seijo's female manager.  Her face was one I've never seen before.  When our eyes met though for the first time, she suddenly resembled (y/n).  After talking to her, I just feel—frustrated.  Tch.  Pathetic.  She can’t possibly exist anymore."

     

    "Was that alright with you?" Iwaizumi asked their manager after their opponents left.  "You guys actually know each other right?"

    "It's fine," she said.  "He's doing fine as he is now.  He doesn't need something to come and mess it up."

    "Well, if you say so."

    "But you know," Oikawa said.  "You can't always keep the bottle lidded.  It will soon overflow, (y/n)-chan."

     

     

     

     

    Hi, Kei.  It’s nice to see you again. 

    Hey, did you know?  I really miss you.

    I keep wondering how you’re doing but you look like you’re doing fine.

    . . .

    Kei.

    . . .

    I’m right here, Kei.

    . . .

    I’m still alive.